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Sermon by Anne Mills - 5-6-16
Change and Choice
First of all, I'd like to thank the people who have
helped me with this service: Barbara, who read the chalice-lighting words and
the first prayer; Marian, who chose the reading and the story, and read for us;
and Chris, for all the music; and all of you---for being here, this morning.
In
the calendar, I am listed as "a member of the Taking the Service seminar group".
I don't often pull rank, but, today, I'm speaking to you as the Chairman of this
Congregation, as there are points to make that we all need to ponder and
remember. We have now entered a period of change; for the foreseeable future, we
are without a minister---our main leader, in so many ways---and that is
something which has rarely happened since this church first came into existence,
in 1974. On our first Sunday without Beryl, we acknowledge her contribution to
this church, and I suspect we will find out, over the next few weeks, how much
she did on our behalf, a great deal of which we were unaware of. Without a
minister, we will lack continuity; we need to pay attention to that and try to
provide it for ourselves.
How,
and whether, we adapt to this change depends entirely on us, and there will be
choices and decisions to be made which may not be easy. How did you feel about
this morning's changes? The chair* and painting** weren't in their usual
places---nor was the story***---it is coming, by the way! I was tempted to
introduce a new hymn-tune, but decided that might be a step too far! Of course,
such changes are small, and easily reversible---simple to handle.
Especially
as we grow older, we become resistant to change---but, sometimes, we can't
escape it; all we can do is cope, and hope and pray for better times. In the
late 1960's, the congregation at Bank Street, Bury, had to decide what to do
about its premises: the church, built of stone, and very large and high, was
horrendously difficult to heat, particularly in winter, and not much better in
summer! Then it was discovered that the building was riddled with wet rot and
dry rot; the organ produced sound with difficulty, and it was only the expertise
of Frank Carter, the organist, that enabled music to be transmitted at all. For
our wedding, in 1968, I went to discuss the music I wanted; most suggestions
were met with a doleful shake of Frank's head: "Sorry---the organ won't manage
that." I'm sure the congregation, faced with the prospect of giving up its
familiar place of worship, was devastated; many members would have been
completely against the idea of starting all over again. People like my father
convinced them, eventually, that the most sensible way forward was to demolish
the building, sell the land to help with financing a new church, and build new
premises which were easier and cheaper to run and maintain. The argument that it
was time to stop throwing good money after bad finally prevailed, and, from our
viewpoint, more than 40 years on, I think the right decision was
reached---although I know that not everyone agreed with my father, at the time!
We now have a beautiful building, admired and envied by others, for its
attractiveness and amenities. Sadly, my father didn't live to see the new church
completed.
At
the same time as deliberations at
Bank Street
were taking place, the congregations at Chesham and Heywood were facing their
own problems, and recognising that their familiar premises were no longer
viable. Brittain Hill, Heywood, was gutted by fire in 1968; no matter how much
the congregation would have wished to rebuild and restore it, this wasn't a
practical proposition. At Chesham, news was received that
Chesham
Primary School
was to re-locate, thus removing a large proportion of the church's income---and
there were problems with the heating-system, as well. Once more, the sensible
option was for the three congregations to join together again, where they had
started originally---in the centre of Bury, so change was forced upon all these
congregations, more or less at the same time, and they were obliged to abandon
their much-loved buildings, move to a completely new place, and meld the three
congregations into one harmonious whole
---a very ambitious project!
The
problem with us Unitarians is that, because we are encouraged to think and
decide for ourselves, we find it difficult to accept that other people's views
might just---occasionally---be superior to our own! I'm sure that the early Bury
Unitarian congregation endured many teething-problems---along the lines of: "
Oh, we never did that" at a particular church, or "We always used to do
it this way" at wherever. The churches had lost their homes and their statuses,
in one fell swoop, and the difficulties to be overcome were tremendous!
Now---the
story: "The Nervous Squirrel".
There was once a family of squirrels who had lived in an
oak tree for generations. The tree provided food, and protection from wild
animals, so the squirrels never left its shelter. Then the tree died; there was
nothing to eat, and the squirrels had a meeting to decide what to do. One
squirrel argued that they needed to move trees, in order to survive, but the
oldest squirrel claimed that they would be killed by predators, if they did. The
young squirrel decided to risk the change, and left; he was never heard of
again, and the old squirrel seemed to have been proved right. In time, when the
squirrels were starving, another youngster also decided to leave, with the same
result, and so it went on, with one after another leaving the oak tree.
Eventually, only the old squirrel was left. He was so thin that his ribs showed
through his skin, yet he continued to mutter about the danger from predators.
Meanwhile, 100 metres away, in the same forest, the rest of the squirrels were
living comfortably, in a lovely new tree, which provided ample food and
protection. Life was good! But they worried about the old squirrel and went back
to visit him; he was in a very bad way, indeed. Despite being told about the
comfortable, new way of life, he refused to change his mind---moving wasn't
worth the risk. He was never heard of again.
How
we handle change matters; it's mainly a question of perspective, I think. I'd
now like to read you a short extract from a piece by Rev. Bob Wightman, now
retired from his ministry at
Dundee,
and a former GA President.
He writes: "I can complain because the weather is rainy,
or I can be thankful that the grass is getting watered for free. I can
grumble about my health, or I can rejoice that I am alive. I can mourn my
lack of friends, or I can excitedly embark upon a quest to discover new
relationships. I can whine because I have to go to work, or I can shout
for joy because I have a job to go to. I can murmur dejectedly because I have to
do housework, or I can feel honoured because God has provided for my
mind, body and soul".
I think you catch the drift!
In
each example, if we choose the first option, the glass is half-empty, and the
response is negative and pessimistic. The second, and far more positive, choice
allows us to move forward, explore possibilities, see matters in a better light.
As regards this congregation, we are not alone in realising that we are an
ageing, declining group. Church-going is not very fashionable, at present, and
this affects all denominations, throughout the country. Two years ago, at a Day
Gathering here, discussing "Growth", I said that what I would really like was to
be able to invite my family and friends to come to a church-service, now and
again, secure in the knowledge that they would accept. I haven't been very
successful, so far---though I won't give up just yet! (Having said this, my
daughter is here, this morning, and I appreciate her presence and support.)
Think about your own situation---how do you think you would get on?
We
are fortunate, however, in that (a) we have sufficient money to maintain this
church, in the style to which it has become accustomed; (b) we have enough
people to do the work---just about; and (c) we are a large, thriving
congregation, compared with other Unitarian churches. We have only to look at
some of our neighbours to realise the truth of this: churches run by one or two
people only, and attracting a mere handful of attendees to services, once or
twice a month.
So:
what should be our formula for success? It seems to me that there are a
few rules we could adopt. We need to co-operate with each other, work together
for the good of the church, and be democratic---this church is about all of us,
not a few select individuals! It's not your church, or mine---it's
ours! Let's be kind to each other, tolerant of opinions, supportive of
each other's work. Above all: let's try not to grumble! If there's a
problem, speak to a church officer, Council-member, or Trustee---that's what
they're there for! Try to resolve the difficulty, rather than muttering under
your breath! And, on the subject of working together, remember that every little
helps. We come to church with expectations: that the building will be warm,
clean and tidy; that the service will be well-prepared and delivered; that the
music and the flowers will be beautiful; that there will be coffee afterwards
(and a biscuit, too, if we're lucky!)
But---don't
forget---somebody has to organise all this, and take the responsibility---it
doesn't happen by magic! And that means that all of us must be involved,
doing what we can, according to our abilities! Coming regularly to church,
sharing worship with others, and offering support and friendship, is one way in
which we can all contribute.
We
have a reputation for being a friendly, welcoming congregation, and I would add
that, at our best, we are generous, caring, pleasant and helpful. Why shouldn't
we always be at our best---for our own sakes, not just to impress
visitors!
The
time of change---transition, if you like---is now; the road forward might
be tough, and we may sometimes feel discouraged; things may not necessarily go
smoothly, especially to begin with, so, please---be patient! There are
bound to be matters that have been overlooked, or forgotten, and these can be
put right, in time. If we give up, or give in to despair, we are lost. We have
the potential, not just to maintain our present position, but to improve upon
it. That is our collective decision---our choice; there are no guarantees that
it will be easy, but let's at least try to achieve what we can. Over the past
five and a half years, this congregation has done some excellent work---let's
not lose our momentum!
Our
glass should be half-full---maybe occasionally in need of a top-up. To coin a
couple of religious phrases, not to mention mixed metaphors---can we all drink
from the same cup, and sing from the same hymn-sheet? I sincerely hope so.
Amen.
*
The chair was on its own, at the front; it bore, on its back, a plaque, in
memory of my parents: George and Rene Sutherland.
**The
painting was presented to the congregation by Alex Rogers, a former Churchwarden
and Chairman of Trustees; it showed the old chapel at
Bank Street,
Bury; it usually hangs in the lounge.
***Instead of a story, the children had an address,
during which they were given information about the decision to demolish the old
chapel and build a new one; they were read the story of "The Nervous Squirrels"
in Sunday School and asked to draw pictures of squirrels.
Anne
Mills:
June 5th, 2016.
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